Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The focus of our reality

It just confounds me how folks don't know that they are creating their world with their thoughts and actions. We spend all our lives interpreting reality via our own minds. Yet we so rarely make that jump to realizing it is us who formulates what we believe. For the most part we are and have been programmed since birth . But it is our mind which implements these programs to create our perspective. We are who we were told we were as children. Our basis for identity starts with the name provided to us by parents then their behavior gets copied via imitation. Of course we have a combo of their genetics as well. But the creation of identity is ego based especially among adolescents. We make ourselves from that point on. It is instinctual. The need to spread our wings and fly on our own terms.

If and when we truly realize this we can really start living with our eyes open. At this point behavior becomes so important not just so as to follow the rules but more importantly for the sake of what following moral rules does to us and those around us. Kindness is not something to do because of a fear of being placed on Santa's naughty list but rather a miraculous gateway to living in a heavenly paradise here on earth. When enacted it acts as a contagious agents. Simple yes, hard to do, well only if you like living in hellish conditions. Stress, anger, all nature of malevolence can be crushed by kindness. Sounds hokey, well yes it does but that doesn't stop it from being true. The problem we are all faced with are patterns of negative behavior we have experienced and absorbed. As Darth Vader goes on about all the time. the darkside is powerful and that it sure is. It infuses the ego and encourages it to gorge itself on negativity. That's what bullying has always been about. But there are two side to that story. The addiction to negativity is taught by exposure to it. Especially at an early age. Without experiencing love, negativity takes its place. Then how can we expect those poor folks to know anything else. The bully in the school yard is usually suffering from low self esteem and no sense of positive identity, most likely no positive role model to provide one. When left to their own devices all creatures do what they can to survive and that most certainly includes emotional survival not just physical.

One of the most over looked aspect of kindness is being kind to oneself. Most folks may not realize how horrid they are to themselves. We usually punish ourselves psychologically as we were punished as children or by someone who had an effect on us . That program is old and deeply set in our psyche. That's why we usually use similar methods with our kids as our parents did with us. But what we do to others we most likely do to our selves. "Judge not lest ye be judged" has always popped out at me as a key statement to this. Since we only know what's going on in our minds the judgment of others can only affect us via our own perception. Considering we can't know the thoughts of others we usually just make them up according to our own insecurities and fears. Just as a dream sequence in a movie when a character informs the dreamer that they too are a part of the dreamers mind. Just some reflection of themselves in a different persona. Everything we commiserate about is how we have chosen to view our reality via old habits. Which most usually makes us feel just like we've been conditioned to feel, as our selves. But that too is a program. Which by the way is not set in stone.

Unless we find the path to kindness we can rarely find peace. Unfortunately contemporary western society seems to believe that money making is the path to happiness. Now we all need a certain amount of it in this world but it is most certainly not the path to happiness. Fact is greed is a never ending opiate and usually destroys our lives, AKA relationships (the only important things we have). All religions and philosophies tell us this. Being kind and good leads quite simply to living a happier and more joyful life. Is it hard? Well yes of course. But once the program is believed (accepted) and hypocrisy rooted out and vanity vanquished (meaning the behavior is changing) it will lead to a calmer more relaxed existence.